Hedonism and gravity

I continue to think deeply about the hedonistic tendencies of the ego.

Dont change - that's work and it's threatening. Always find a reason to exist. be superior. no pain- unless it's a badge of honor. Indulge Indulge indulge - in fantasy behavior, tv, movies, emotions, laziness, delusions and denial.

I can see how my ego and hedonistic leanings have stalled my growth. I can also see how it's pushed my ambitions in ways that dont really make sense.

I need to figure out what I really want from this life and how i can make a better contribution to my wife and family. Essentially, I have three main resources: time, energy, and money. Instead of pushing so hard I am exhausted, lonely, broke (from indulgences and mis-spending) and alienated from anything meaningful, I think I need to look at Maslow's again and rethink my priorities.

Why have I (do we) make "survival" such a moving target?