conversation

I am not dead. i am within you and all things and you hve observed. i am you, therrefore, and that is why you cannot understand yourself fully, just like you cannot understand Me fully. The vastness of the universe and the exactness of it are all contained in ONE.

Do not fret about whether or not you will survive the deathof your body. you were alive before it and you will be alive after its demise and the demise of all the stars and planets and particles you want to explore.

Keep reaching for your understanding, however, it will serve you well as you age. but know, that it all is unknowable.

Eric, that is the second time you've edited me - albeit slightly. please refrain from doing that again.

ok, sorry.

no worries.

i love you and all that i've created like you love your children and your ideas. my ideas begat the universerse you ideas beget a universe of possiblitlies both knowable and unknowable. you matter. you are matter.

Therefore, the course you are on is a good one, even if, like the stars, it means colliding with someone or some things athat you'll find disturbing or distastful. The answer is to keep on trying.

your head is fuzzy today, i see. yes that's good. meditat while i type.

when you do thi iyou are seeking answers and insights, yes>/
yes

what is your question then?

well, its a two parter

go forr it

will i every be close to my wife - to really open up to her and she opening up to me?  and if not, will i be abl to move on and not be obseded with the gap.


first, you still dont fully understand what's happening in your marriage. hyour wife loves you very much and wants what you want. she just doesnt have the words to describe how she needs to approach that. whterher or not you will be close  in the way you are thinkinig has to tdo with the course of events over which you have no control. it also has to do with your and her decisions and actions. there is much to describe about this topic as it is a very meay one. since you have to pee, i will say that all things are truly possible if you are pure in your heart and respectful of Me.

i think that answers both questions. brb?

yes

As i was saying, you keep fighting with me for creative control. but creativity and control are two different things. you cannot control the universe. i designed it that way. you can only ask and listen quietly as you are doing now, for the answer. you cannot bend or twist anything to yeild to your desires. no one can. you have ben insisting on that and it is the source of your greatest pain and an allusion of success when coinsedences aline and it appears thatyou have gotten what you alone have planned or intended.

you are scared of being an instrument of my desires or of another force massively more powerful than you. you are afraid of what is, and also what you do ont understand. you can react. you cannot create. you are being tested all the time for your goodness and a record is being kept - not to indict you - but to track your progress and you march toward something you do ot and cannot understand.

and you ARE making progress, ERic. but. let it go. let go of all the ideas and plans and dreams and designs you have running in your head. just focus on the quality of your decisions and the ettiquette of your actions. liffe as you know it, is too short and you so rarely appreciate the magnificance of the world aroound you.

stop being 'the fighter' just be the listener and the witness and the hopeful participant - hopeful that you are honoring your ethics and being respectful of what is around you. it is far greater in beauty and grace than you imagine. stop trying to influence. it cannot be a consious act, anyway. you are not a tv set.

listen. trust. obey. honor. love. love love love.

that's it for now, but ask for me again, soon.

there is so much more to say.

goodbye for now, eric. peace.