Saturday, December 05, 2009

Life Plans

Here's the deal. I'm just going to say that I am afraid of my purpose, or rather I am afraid that my purpose will kill me.

That's silly b/c I'm going to die anyway. I guess I just thought that I wouldn't participate in it.

I guess I think my purpose has a lot to do with uplifting a mass of people. I used to say that I was destined for greatness. I used to say that all the time. I used to say - not often, but I remember that perfect beach day perfectly - that I was supposed to uplift a generation.

Those are big concepts and I have always felt like I was going to do something big. For a while now, I've attributed that thinking to personality disorder and maybe I wasnt far off, but maybe my personality disorder wasn't far from reality either.

So the issue is really about courage, I think. And now I have questions.

No comments: